The Top Ten Things Video Gamers Are Tired of Hearing

Editors Note – This is a humor article and is one writer’s opinion. This does not represent Geeks Under Grace’s views as a whole.

As gamers, we have had to put up with all sorts of ribbing from people who simply do not understand gamer culture. Whether it be from school bullies, parents, or even our own non-gamer friends, we gamers have all gone through some amount of hassle when defending our favorite hobby. The one person we feel should love and support us in doing what makes us happy is our spouse or steady. Unfortunately, even these individuals–as much of a blessing that they are to us–are certainly not above trying to take their beloved gamer down a few pegs. Today, I will outline what I believe are the top ten things we gamers are sick and tired of hearing from our significant others.


10. “You like playing video games more than you like spending time with me.”

Now don’t get me wrong. We gamers love to spend time with our main squeezes. I mean, let’s face it, most hardcore gamers are not known for their overwhelming ability to charm the ladies. So believe me when I say that we are grateful to have you all in our lives. But chances are, we fell in love with gaming before we fell in love with you. Don’t take it personally. The games give us a fulfillment that you simply cannot, and in turn, you give us fulfillment that the games cannot.

Internet Husband


9. “Don’t you ever get bored?”

You may be surprised to learn that gamers like to play games. I’m sure you do not easily become bored doing whatever recreational activities you find pleasing. To be perfectly honest, yes, we do become bored eventually, playing even the greatest of games, and when that happens, we play something else. However, 9 times out of 10 this is actually a rhetorical question, and is more of a passive-aggressive way of trying to tell us to turn our game system off. Nice try.

And It's Gone


8. “You have too many games.”

Once again, I must point out that gamers like to play games. Acquiring games is simply a part of a gamer’s life. Our library never stops growing. I’m sure if we looked around, we could find things that you seem to hoard with reckless abandon. So let me ask, how many pairs of shoes do you own? How large is your collection of tools in the garage? How many boxes of books do you have stashed in the basement or attic? How many wristwatches do you have exactly? … Yeah, I thought you’d get quiet on that one.

Play All the Games


7. “Can you turn that down?”

Sometimes we gamers need to hear our game. Crazy, eh? As games have become increasingly sophisticated, sound in particular has become very important in gameplay. This importance manifests itself in many ways. It could be being able to listen for rustling in the bushes to avoid being taken by surprise, receiving information from a party member about a trap that is 2 steps ahead, or trying to hear any number of mechanisms ticking, clicking, or clacking to try and isolate a pattern. In this day and age, the necessity in hearing our games cannot be overstated.

Game_Volume


6. “It’s way too dark in here.”

Some of us are just not the type of people who need every light in the house on. We prefer to not have glare on our television screen, particularly when the environment is darkly illuminated. Trying to sneak around in near-dark with lamp or sun glare on the screen is highly annoying. So yes, we will turn off the lamps and hang dark bed sheets over the windows if that is what it takes. On another note, there are just some games that are best enjoyed in the dark.

Slender_Meme


5. “Can I play?”

It’s not that we don’t like spending time with you (see above), it’s just there are several caveats that go along with playing co-op, assuming the game we’re playing at the time can be played with 2 players. First, there are some games in which adding another player means starting all over again. We’re not hitting the reset button just because you’re bored. Second, there are some games that are simply terrible when played co-op. Single player is great, but somehow the programmers goofed scripting co-op. Now, that’s hardly your fault, but the fact remains that we will not want to play co-op. Third and lastly, assuming the first two concerns are non-issues, we don’t feel like burning through three-quarters of our health potions just to compensate for your lack of experience. If you’re that interested, play single player by yourself and get your skills up to snuff. Then we’ll talk.

Game_Over


4. “I put your gaming stuff away.”

This really gets on our nerves. There’s a reason we don’t unplug our consoles, reshelf our games, stash our controllers, and put away our notebooks after every single gaming session. Chances are, we’ll be playing again very soon, and we prefer to find things the way we left them. Our gaming equipment is not “in the way,” despite your insistence that it is. You’re lucky we put it away when company comes over, and sometimes not even then. If your vision of a perfect living room/den/family room/rumpus room was contingent on having no video games in it, then you are destined to remain disappointed.

Don't_Touch_My_Games


3. “You spend too much time playing video games.”

This is probably the second-most overused phrase directed at gamers. Unfortunately, for the majority of us, we put up with our parents–usually our mothers–shouting this at us our entire lives growing up. By the time you’ve entered the picture, we’re numb to such a clichéd complaint. Attempts to direct this pitiful utterance at us will only end in frustration for you, and will likely cause unpleasant childhood memories of confiscated games to resurface, so do both of us a favor and save your breath.

Gamers gotta game


2. “I need you to pause the game.”

I’m sure you knew we were playing video games before you began whatever mundane task you so desperately need us to get up and attend to. However, you decided that what you’re doing is more important, and that we must stop what we are doing and cater to your whims. Why would you do something like that to us? Have you considered that we may be playing with others online? In that scenario, immediately getting up would ruin not only our game, but the game of every single person we’re playing with (Any WoW or other MMORPG player who has ever had their healer d/c in the middle of a boss fight knows what I’m talking about). Then you must also consider that some games do not have a pause feature, or at least don’t pause during certain points (White Knight Chronicles I & II during quests). So, unless someone is dead or dying, you can manage on your own until we finish what we’re doing and find a save point.

No Pause Game


1. “Don’t you have anything better to do?”

Finally, we have what I believe is the most irritating thing one can say to a gamer. I mean, don’t YOU have anything better to do than to stand in the middle of the room and chastise us? We have a reasonable assurance that you knew of our gaming habits long before you fell head over heels for us. Don’t have dater’s remorse now and take for granted to insinuate that we should be using our time differently. We are gamers, and this is the culture we have chosen for ourselves. We can coexist, and even thrive together, but it requires give and take, and just because you see gaming as a waste of time does not mean we need to be the ones doing most of the giving by curtailing our gaming practices just to suit your preferences.

OAG_1


So there you have it. I hope the gamers reading this got a few chuckles, and the non-gamers have learned some essential tips for living with a gamer. Does your significant other throw one phrase at you markedly more than any other? Tell us in the comments below!

Happy gaming, and God bless.

Steve Schoen

Live to game; game to live. Nominal Christian from birth; practicing Christian since 2002. I love to talk all things gaming, from console classics to Dungeons & Dragons.

16 Comments

  1. questdrivencollie on September 19, 2014 at 2:01 am

    I totally understand about needing to hear. But as someone who lives with a (very) loud and competitive gamer (my brother) for the time being, I have to say there are definitely times when others’ need for silence overrules their need for gaming. In my family, we wear headphones when others need some quiet time.
    (What I wish we could fix that easily is my brother’s obnoxious screaming during competitive games. He refuses to shut up even with parental involvement, and there are times I legitimately need peace and quiet. Schoolwork, for instance.)

    (I do game, so it’s not like I don’t understand what’s being said from the perspective of someone doing what they enjoy doing. But I’m a casual gamer at best. Usually play once or twice a week, if that. Most of my geek time is spent on anime.)

  2. Jon Hill on September 19, 2014 at 1:02 am

    Without splitting hairs and keeping mindful of the overall tone of the article, this is funny because its stereotypical and true… Good stuff, brah

    • Steve Schoen on September 19, 2014 at 1:08 am

      Thank you, my good man!

  3. Kay on September 18, 2014 at 3:02 pm

    And stupid, selfish reasons like these are why most gamers are forever alone. There are priorities in life and people (family, SO, friends) should always come before a game. Gaming is a form of entertainment, not an excuse to do nothing but. Do what you must do first, then relax playing.
    As an MMO healer, I know the importance of being present, but you bet your butt I get all my work done first (clean, cook for my husband, pay bills, spend time with family) before I turn on the game. Should something come up mid-game that requires my attention I drop my control, do what I must and join again (yes, even if it means asking the party to wait 5 minutes).

  4. Hyrulean Walt on September 15, 2014 at 9:12 pm

    Best article I’ve ever read. Most of these are completely accurate, I shared this to Facebook. Number 1 and 3 are the best, but number 4 is kinda true. Sometimes I want to play with a buddy or family member.
    BUT STILL
    Great article! 😀 Cheers to the writer.

    • Steve Schoen on September 16, 2014 at 4:13 am

      Thank you for the kind words, my friend.

  5. Rachel on September 15, 2014 at 8:46 pm

    I am going to agree with jddennis here. There are a few points on this list that are valid (Numbers 9-6 in particular) But then it starts to get ridiculous. They take on the mentality of “My (Video) game is far more important than whatever you have to say to me right now.” Even if it’s “I need you to pause the game because we need to have an important discussion” or “Dude, get off, we’re going to be late for bible study!” Even “You spend too much time playing video games, don’t you have three essays to write?” can get clumped into this. Plus, most of these “things we’re tired of hearing” are actually important clues that you’ve been sitting starting at a screen for too long. jddennis has hit the mark on this-God is supposed to come first in all things, not hobbies.

    I had thought that I had found kindred spirits in Geeks under Grace: people devoted to God but also enjoyed video games and other pop culture items. Now I’m not so sure. Maybe I need to look deeper. Or maybe elsewhere.

    • Wesley Wood on September 15, 2014 at 9:04 pm

      This is one writers opinion and does not represent GUG as a whole.

    • Rob M. on September 15, 2014 at 9:43 pm

      Also, it’s a humor/satire piece, so please take that into consideration.

    • Drew on September 16, 2014 at 1:45 pm

      To be frank i find it comical when consumers on websites threaten to stop reading said website/blog because they found one article that they disagreed with. jddennis and yourself already propagate a self-righteous attitude and judge this writer’s own walk with God. If you read even the first point it is clearly satire as anyone who says to their boyfriend/girlfriend that videogames fulfill them in ways their significant other cannot, will most probably be broken up with on the spot. With all due respect to jjdennis, this website is clearly for VIDEO gamers and if you believed otherwise that is your fault entirely. So don’t be so offended that a website is not inclusionary of you.

      Humor people. Humor.

      • jddennis on September 17, 2014 at 5:56 am

        Drew,

        Thanks for your comments.

        If I may, I’m not sure I expressed what I was thinking clearly. First I’m not advocating for people to stop reading a particular website based off of what’s posted. Our faith is a big one, with a lot of different interpretations and plenty of room for different preference. And that’s great! We should be able to share our diversity out of love and mutual goodwill. We may not be always in agreement, but we’re still people who Christ loves and calls. I forgot that a bit. And for that, apologies to Steve for the unintended disrespect.

        Maybe the article is trying to make a point ABOUT gamers. Maybe I missed something in my reading. After all, there are three levels to any interpersonal communication: what is intended by the originator, what is communicated by the originator, and what the recipient interprets.

        My own interpretation reflects my thoughts and opinions because it’s based on my experience. What I saw (and still frankly see) is a post that is projecting on another people group — the “significant others.” I’ve been doing research on scapegoating and it’s effect on society overall, so that’s what I saw. Again. not necessarily Steve’s intent, but what I got out of that. I apologize for my own misunderstanding.

        Finally, I don’t see this website as for strictly only video gamers. There are sections for literature, movies, anime, music, and Christian Living (amongst others). Gaming’s only a fraction of what the website’s supposed to be according to my interpretation of the site map, and there’s plenty here to keep me interested. I’d just like to see some more content that focuses on a particular area which I enjoy and I know is very popular with others.

        • Steve Schoen on September 17, 2014 at 6:26 am

          Let me start off by saying that it takes a tremendous amount of courage and character to humble oneself and admit they were wrong, or at least mistaken. So, let me first commend you for it. Second, while the phrases in red are genuinely phrases I believe video gamers are tired of hearing from non-gamer significant others, my elaboration on those points is melodramatic hyperbole. Now, while there are certainly kernels of truth in these points (I do get annoyed with glare on my TV screen and attempt to snuff the lights and obscure my windows whenever possible; and my wife hassles me for it), they are not to be taken as serious relationship advice. Third, I suppose my use of the term gamer simply stems from the fact that it’s always what I’ve called myself, and people I’ve talked to in my life have always understood the word “gamer” to mean “player of video games.” However, with a website like this one, I agree that a distinction is necessary. There are tabletop gamers and video gamers, both umbrella terms for many types in each case. And finally, we are a rather new site, and we are working tirelessly to appeal to every corner of geekdom. So, I urge you to enjoy what we have to offer and keep checking back, as we are always recruiting and attempting to fill our ranks with quality writers, collectively capable of reaching everyone. Thank you for choosing Geeks Under Grace, where there’s a little salvation in every click, and be sure to stay tuned for my next Top Ten List. 🙂

        • Drew on September 17, 2014 at 10:42 pm

          Thank you for comments as well dennis. Your clarifications do help me understand your position much better. Most of my comments were directed at Rachel though you even clarified her comments.

          I apologize for my aggressive tone. I don’t think I was having a great day lol.

          Cheers.

  6. jddennis on September 15, 2014 at 5:24 pm

    This entire article is a bit offensive, honestly. First, it automatically assumes that all gamers are VIDEO gamers. Which isn’t the case. I don’t play video games. I’m an active tabletop gamer, though, and I log at least 20 hours or so gaming — much of the time with my girlfriend. So the inherent video game experience described above is exclusionist whereas there are plenty of other gaming experiences that are inclusive.

    Second, and more important, this sounds like the rant of someone who wants to put their personal priorities first. If you’re describing yourself as only a gamer, that means that it’s the priority in your life. It’s great to have a hobby. But when the hobby becomes the priority (as the article implies), you’re not living in a Godly way at all. You’re living a me-centered life. How can you be a geek under grace and still be living in such a way?

  7. Jddennis on September 15, 2014 at 5:10 pm

    This

  8. Blake on September 15, 2014 at 3:08 pm

    I completely agree with this whole list lol

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